Unigate milk – There’s a Humphrey about: quotes of frustration and the mystery of disappearing milk

“The milkman said he left three bottles on the doorstep, but I only picked-up two!

“My glass was full when I nipped-off for a quick pee. When I came back, three quarters of it had gone. I thought the wife had downed-it but she swore that she hadn’t. Strange …”

“I’d heard stories about milk going missing – what a load of cobblers! It wasn’t until I noticed that we were literally being sucked-dry of milk that I began to believe that maybe there was a milk thief on the prowl.”

“I really thought the milkman was telling porkies: after pinning him against the wall and punching him in the stomach, he still insisted that he’d delivered the full six bottles.”

“I’m considering putting some kind of lock on the fridge door.”

“Mrs Thomas deliberately woke-up early to spy on the milkman. She reported back that the exact quantity were delivered to all the neighbours.“

“It disappears into thin air!”

“Turned my back for a couple of minutes, came back and my full glass of milk was empty!”

“I’ve just written a letter to the MP about this mysterious milk disappearance. It just can’t continue!”

“I’m having sleepless nights about the disappearing milk saga.”

“It’s turned into a guessing game of how many bottles will be missing from our doorstep today? The kids love guessing but I’m sick of this whole fiasco.”

“The police are mystified and so am I: why can’t they solve this milk stealing spree?

They call them Humphreys. They are Invisible, sneaky and silent. They are after one thing: your milk. Do not to leave any glasses of milk out of sight inside your home. The final piece of advice is to drink it quick because Humphreys are slick. See how the Humphreys operate by watching the video below – click image to watch:

Remember when Big Daddy and Giant Haystacks threw their weight around the wrestling ring? A time when the Milk Tray Man secretly delivered chocolates. Mr Kipling made exceedingly good cakes, but which were your favourites? Fun, straplines and nostalgic photos in the new hardback book, Section N Underpass, a nostalgic trip reliving advertising, leisure and entertainment from the 70s and 80s – fiction with loads of interesting facts. Click any of the images below to get your copy:

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