The Krypton Factor: Are you superhuman?

 

THE first thing to be clear about is this: the Krypton Factor had nothing to do with Lex Luthor trying to destroy Superman and taking over the world. It was about discovering whether or not a contestant was superhuman.

Let’s face it, to even set foot onto the Krypton Factor you had to be a clever clogs. I can imagine the contestants being the ones whose arm shot-up before the teacher had finished asking a question in the classroom – the ones whom would spend their Saturday mornings with their heads deep in books at the local library.

Think you’re superhuman? The five competencies below will help you decide whether or not to apply to become a contestant on the Krypton Factor challenge.

 

1. How good is your general knowledge? Does Trivial Pursuit send you into a head scratching rage or are the questions so easy that you can answer them whilst in deep sleep? Maybe because of your extraordinary knowledge you’ve been banned from all pub quizzes. If it sounds like you’re a general knowledge geek then you’re on track to become a potential contestant and compete for superhuman status.

2. Any good with jigsaws? As a general guide, if you struggle helping your four-year-old complete their 10 piece jigsaw puzzle then maybe you sit in the human category. If on the other hand a 5000 piece jigsaw is a relaxing hobby then that’s a huge thumbs-up.

3. Observation skills? If you were asked to describe the appearance of a colleague you’ve spent the last 20 years working with, would you struggle? Do you notice the new hairstyle your partner is sporting before they mention they’ve been to the hairdressers? If your skills of observation are so poor that you can’t remember the skin colour of your next-door neighbour then maybe hold-fire on sending in your application.

4. So your general knowledge is good, jigsaws are easy and your observation skills make the metropolitan police look like amateurs so you’re about to send in your application. Before you seal that envelope, ask yourself ‘… am I able endure the physical rigour of completing a army training exercise course?’ In the Krypton Factor you’re expected to run, climb, jump and crawl throughout the muddy training course whilst being yelled at by a bunch of army professionals. It’s all part of the challenge so if the thought of physical endurance fills you with dread then don’t seal that envelope just yet.

5. Have you ever flown an aeroplane? If you have then that’s a massive bonus. As part of the Krypton Factor challenge you’ll have to climb into the cockpit of a flight simulator with the sole objective of landing the jet safely on the runway. If you’ve never flown an aeroplane all is not lost: get used to handling a joystick whilst playing various video games – every little helps and could prove to be invaluable practice.


 

Conclusion

5 out of 5

A massive yes to all five of the competencies mentioned above: don’t hesitate – get your application sent into Gordon burns, the host of the Krypton Factor. You have a good chance of achieving superhuman status.

4 out of 5

There’s no reason not to send in your application. You might surprise yourself, get accepted and do jolly well on the television challenge!

3 out of 5

This is where you you start treading on middle ground between human and superhuman. It’s your call whether or not to submit your application – decide by choosing heads or tails and flipping the coin.

2 out of 5

Know your place and humbly accept that you’re just human. Get on with your life, enjoy nature and maybe get involved in a local art group.

0 – 1 out of 5

You’re 100% human and sadly there’s not one strand of superhuman DNA in your body – just watch and enjoy the Krypton Factor on Monday evenings!


 

 


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